In the second of a series of articles aiming to spread positivity, South Woodford resident and mindset and confidence coach Nicky Kentisbeer helps you find your festive sparkle

‘Tis the season of goodwill and kindness, and for some, it is a time of joy, whilst for others, there will be mixed emotions.

It’s also a time when those festive triggers are out in force. And when I say trigger, I refer to the things that can set us and others off faster than it takes to pull a cracker.

Because even though we’ve seen a year of huge change, Christmas is a time when we traditionally step back into the roles that we play within our respective groups and families. It’s what we do – right?

And those triggers can be as simple as someone getting their knuckles rapped by the family matriarch for using their serviette as a tissue, or perhaps that certain ‘someone’ might have one too many sherries and probe a little too deeply into what it is that you ‘actually’ do? And all the while you just know they’ve got their hand in the Quality Street tin (again) and that they will leave you with the toffee ones – which play havoc with your dental crowns. They know this.

Unless, of course, they are on Zoom this year.

I jest, of course, but love it or hate it, it can be a time when the old magnifying mirror comes out and we may be forced to deal with things we would rather not have to during the season of peace and goodwill.

And to those of you that may have been brought up in the school of hard knocks in the ‘just get on with it’ generation, may I remind you of the gift of self-love?

If you are one of life’s ‘doers’, Christmas can be interesting. You will excel at taking care of everyone’s needs and being all things to all people – but please don’t forget to take care of yourself too.

Because if you are above a certain age (as many of us are), you may well find all the talk of self-love and care a little bit cringe! Looking after ourselves can sometimes feel a bit ‘awks’ and self-indulgent when there is so much to do, can’t it?

The doers among you will struggle with this.

But self-love and self-care are not self-indulgent. We need to love and care for ourselves too. Because everything we do starts with us. Everything.

So, as you move through the festive period, make sure you aren’t pouring from an empty glass and be sure to love yourself as hard as you love others. Remember to do the things that make your heart sing, however that may look for you. There is always joy to be had in the small things, and that is generally the place where you will find your sparkle too.

For more information and to contact Nicky, visit nickykentisbeer.com